27 June, 2011

Stubbornness vs Stupidity. Round One.

The Invertebrate says: "La Mondaine, I'd like you to leave the computer systems alone and just concentrate on sorting out the inventory and filing we brought you back here to help with in the first place."

La Mondaine hears: "Computer systems! Right! I'll get right on it!"

[There then follows several short and emphatic conversations between me, the Stress Fiend and The Invertebrate during which it's made clear to him - again - that La Mondaine must not be allowed to touch any kind of digital record or worflow under any circumstances].

La Mondaine flounces in to work: "What would you like me to do today?"

The Invertebrate: "Concentrate on the filing. It's in a halfway state at the moment, and it's making it hard for the others to find stuff easily."

La Mondaine: "Right!"

[Five minutes later]

"What shall I do with the request from this client? I started trying to sort it out for them, and then it got really complicated..."

[The Stress Fiend goes on annual leave. The Invertebrate & I discuss how to keep everything running, seeing as senior management still won't allow us to replace Ted E. Personally I'm all in favour of just letting things collapse in a heap, because that seems to be the only thing that provokes management into actually acknowledging there's a problem. We agree - in the sense that I tell him this is how things must be - that La Mondaine will be pointed at the filing and banned from doing any work that involves a computer].

The Invertebrate is off-site for a management team bonding exercise. La Mondaine arrives to "work".

"What would you like me to do?"

"The filing."

"Not the service desk queue, or the email?"

"No, just the filing."

[A few minutes of silence].

"What do you think The Invertebrate would like me to do?"

"The filing."

"Are you sure? Maybe I should go on with something else just now, and we can ask him when he gets in."

"No, we spoke about this yesterday and agreed the filing is what you need to concentrate on."



"This is driving me mad! When will The Invertebrate be in?"

"He's offsite all day. He won't be in."

"Oh. Was there anything else he wanted me to do today?"


"Are you sure?"


"Would you like me to - "

"No. Filing."

""How about I - "



And so it comes about that the filing is finally - finally! - underway.

1 comment:

Lusus Naturae said...

I am increasingly of the opinion that La Mondaine is in fact a very large toddler.

"Can I have a pudding?"
"No. Clean your room."
"Mummy said I could have a pudding."
"No, she said you had to clean your room."
"Oh... Can I have a pudding then?"

Repeat ad nauseum.

Amusing side note: Word verification is "totrum" which I suspect is part of La Mondaine's problems.