I drew immense and guilt-free satisfaction from watching a never-before-seen nervous tic in Ted E.'s face dance madly throughout this morning's team meeting, especially as we drew closer to subjects he's feeling defensive about right now. Maybe he's finally starting to realise he's pushed his luck that little bit too far lately with his games.
I'm enjoying his discomfiture far too much, though, and suspect I might be straying a bit too close to wanting to make him squirm for its own sake. Luckily only the guilty have anything to fear...
31 July, 2008
25 July, 2008
Exercise
Time for a walk - Ted E. is trying to be helpful, and I just want to kill him on principle.
Relative values
Dear god... a recent staff satisfaction survey across the larger area I'm a part of yielded such awful results that the powers that be are touring each individual team to discuss personally what things are making people unhappy.
Ted E.'s complaint that he plans to bring up?* That he's been here six years and isn't getting paid more for doing work that's more in line with the payscale below him than the one he's actually on.
And somehow I don't think he finds that objectionable for the same reasons I do...
* Apart from me, of course. I don't think he's quite stupid enough to announce that ahead of time in front of me.
Ted E.'s complaint that he plans to bring up?* That he's been here six years and isn't getting paid more for doing work that's more in line with the payscale below him than the one he's actually on.
And somehow I don't think he finds that objectionable for the same reasons I do...
* Apart from me, of course. I don't think he's quite stupid enough to announce that ahead of time in front of me.
23 July, 2008
One of life's little mysteries
Why did we buy Ted E. a laptop again, anyway? I think this must have been one of those "vision" things, where the goal was to give Software Services extra mobility. But it's not like Ted E. is ever going to take a laptop home with him to put in a few extra hours, nor is it even likely that he's got any kind of work that even lends itself to that. Which only really leaves letting him roam to other campuses to meet other staff, and why in god's name would you want to let Ted E. out without adult supervision?
There's no reward for being healthy
On the way to work: text message from reliable, friendly team member telling me she won't be able to make it in.
On arrival: voicemail waiting from the Stress Fiend, telling me her partner is still dying and requires attention (after at least three days, surely they could at least hospitalise him???)
Ten minutes later: Ted E. rings in to say he's still sick and won't be in today. Laughs when he realises there's no-one else here.
On arrival: voicemail waiting from the Stress Fiend, telling me her partner is still dying and requires attention (after at least three days, surely they could at least hospitalise him???)
Ten minutes later: Ted E. rings in to say he's still sick and won't be in today. Laughs when he realises there's no-one else here.
22 July, 2008
A superstitious, cowardly lot.
I'm a team of one today. Further proof that it's not actually possible for me to be too cynical or pessimistic about my workplace.
One person is legitimately unwell and may well (against both our better judgments) struggle in later today - I deliberately didn't tell them about Ted E. and the Stress Fiend being off today); after having last Friday off, Ted E. spent much of yesterday foreshadowing being off today with a cold (in fairness, he was producing a lot of mucus yesterday, but it's so hard not to be cynical about his motives at the best of times); and the Stress Fiend is away a second day looking after her ill husband, who never seems to get sick in anything less than two-day increments. And again, a high degree of cynicism tends to creep into my views on the Stress Fiend's absence rates.
What's compounding my distrust of some of my teams motives is that Ted E. and the Stress Fiend were both supposed to sit down together yesterday and work through a process that one of them doesn't want to look after, and the other doesn't want to hand over.
One person is legitimately unwell and may well (against both our better judgments) struggle in later today - I deliberately didn't tell them about Ted E. and the Stress Fiend being off today); after having last Friday off, Ted E. spent much of yesterday foreshadowing being off today with a cold (in fairness, he was producing a lot of mucus yesterday, but it's so hard not to be cynical about his motives at the best of times); and the Stress Fiend is away a second day looking after her ill husband, who never seems to get sick in anything less than two-day increments. And again, a high degree of cynicism tends to creep into my views on the Stress Fiend's absence rates.
What's compounding my distrust of some of my teams motives is that Ted E. and the Stress Fiend were both supposed to sit down together yesterday and work through a process that one of them doesn't want to look after, and the other doesn't want to hand over.
17 July, 2008
Not exactly funny, but...
Team meeting, only the second since I officially became acting team leader ... and I think I scared Ted E. when he pushed his luck just that little bit too far by trying to slip a barefaced lie past me. The problem (for him) was that he sent two versions of the same email to different people in the team last week. The one he sent to his teammates irritated them enough; the one he sent to me and my manager ... well, let's not go into it.
But in the meeting today he tried to claim he'd never said one of the things he'd said in the email to me (versus what he'd said to the others). Which I knew was a lie - it was only the truth by the most generous of technicalities - and then he repeatedly tried to say he'd never said that.
What happened next wasn't a glorious moment for either of us but, on the bright side, it could have been a lot worse. I didn't break a chair over his head, for instance. After the third or fourth denial, I was on my feet heading for my computer where his email was still on screen: "Look, don't make me read out what you wrote. If you sent different emails to the rest of the group, that's your problem. But don't tell me you didn't write that!"
Ted E. finally seemed to realise he'd crossed a line (the look on his face was a pretty close approximation of a dinosaur looking at an oncoming asteroid and thinking"Hey, waitaminute..."), and suddenly stopped pressing his claim. He's been very agreeable and compliant since then, too, because that's probably the first time anyone in a team leader role has spoken to him like that. I think I may have scared the absolute hell out of him, so that's got to be worth something...
But in the meeting today he tried to claim he'd never said one of the things he'd said in the email to me (versus what he'd said to the others). Which I knew was a lie - it was only the truth by the most generous of technicalities - and then he repeatedly tried to say he'd never said that.
What happened next wasn't a glorious moment for either of us but, on the bright side, it could have been a lot worse. I didn't break a chair over his head, for instance. After the third or fourth denial, I was on my feet heading for my computer where his email was still on screen: "Look, don't make me read out what you wrote. If you sent different emails to the rest of the group, that's your problem. But don't tell me you didn't write that!"
Ted E. finally seemed to realise he'd crossed a line (the look on his face was a pretty close approximation of a dinosaur looking at an oncoming asteroid and thinking"Hey, waitaminute..."), and suddenly stopped pressing his claim. He's been very agreeable and compliant since then, too, because that's probably the first time anyone in a team leader role has spoken to him like that. I think I may have scared the absolute hell out of him, so that's got to be worth something...
14 July, 2008
The pain of being civil.
Replying to Ted E.'s emails always makes me disproportionately cross, because when responding to his poorly written bouts of badly-concealed petulance (we're not paying you what you're worth? Well aren't you the lucky one!) it's probably bad form for me as Team Leader to simply tell him to grow up and stop being a f****wit.
He has a remarkable talent for being able to undermine any valid points he makes by a) assuming that it's all about him, and b) drowning them in childishness.
He has a remarkable talent for being able to undermine any valid points he makes by a) assuming that it's all about him, and b) drowning them in childishness.
02 July, 2008
"... it's the only way to be sure."
Oh dear. Ted E. wants to have a weekly team meeting purely for the purposes of discussing emails that have or haven't been answered, and to discuss email filing procedures.
If I kill him now, perhaps I can prevent the madness from spreading.
If I kill him now, perhaps I can prevent the madness from spreading.
01 July, 2008
Unfiltered reality
I've lost my desensitisation to the Stress Fiend's work habits. Long exposure to the Cow-orker had largely inoculated me against the worst of the Stress Fiend's antics, but a new team member is finding them difficult to deal with and I've been forced to view the Stress Fiend without any sanity filters in place.
The horror.
The horror.
The horror.
The horror.
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